Women Still Want to be Taken
Check out my latest article about why the 50 Shades movie bombed - but women still want to be taken. The movie may have been a dud but we can't ignore the attention the book trilogy received and the overwhelming fact that being dominated is a very common fantasy for...
New Year’s Resolution – More Sex in 2015
In my latest article for Theravive.com I talk about how to address low sexual desire as a New Year’s Resolution – More Sex in 2015. Here's what I had to say: "One of the most frequent sexual complaints for women is low sexual desire (Ellison, 2001). And one common...
Should Marriage Therapists Have Perfect Marriages?
My husband and I recently attended a couples retreat to work on some rough spots in our marriage. Yes people – marriage therapists don’t have perfect marriages! We are human just like you. It was humbling and difficult. While I have no delusions that I am a perfect...
Foreplay and Erectile Dysfunction
Are you getting the foreplay you need for solid erections? If you're not getting enough foreplay, your erectile dysfunction may be caused by lack of stimulation. Yes, sometimes erectile dysfunction is related to how much stimulation you are receiving when having sex...
When sex is painful
Sex can be painful for many reasons. Occasionally men suffer from painful sex but painful sex is more common with women. For women, sometimes it can be something basic like needing a quality lubricant, feeling safe/comfortable and relaxed, or getting the...
People Lie About Sex
People lie about sex for many reasons. People lie about sex to have more sex, to have less sex, to avoid embarrassment, to avoid conflict, to avoid hurting others' feelings, to maintain privacy or to maintain appropriate and healthy personal boundaries. When it comes...
Spontaneous sex is a myth
In couples counseling I often see lovers who struggle with the desire and energy to have spontaneous sex because of stress and fatigue from life's day to day obligations. Or sometimes it's just getting on the same page. When one partner is in the mood for sex and...
Help for partners of sex addicts
I want to take a moment and offer help for partners of sex addicts. Whether it's porn addiction, infidelity, or obsessive sex related behaviors, being in a relationship with a sex addict or someone who repeatedly lies about their sexual behaviors can be paralyzing and...
When Sex is Boring or Unsatisfying
When sex with our partner gets predictable, boring, or unsatisfying, we lose interest in having sex – it's low sexual desire 101. If you don't get your sexual needs met with your partner or when sex is focused more on efficiency than pleasure and connection, you...
Resolutions: Improve Your Sex Life
At the top of the list of most worthy resolutions: improve your sex life this year. In order to do that you need to FOCUS on what you WANT sexually. Because whatever you focus on gets bigger.... If you focus on pleasure, what turns you on, what you consider sexy, you...