Fixing relationships in sex therapy
Want to improve your marriage or intimate relationship when the sex isn't great? Go to a sex therapist - someone trained in fixing relationships in sex therapy. For couples counseling, therapists without training in sex therapy or sexuality don't always have the...
Why Talking About Sexual Trauma Heals
Sexual trauma comes in all shapes and sizes - but let's talk about why talking about sexual trauma heals. Sometimes it looks like rape or sexual abuse. Sometimes it looks like infidelity, a sexual affair, or an emotional affair. Whatever it looks like, many of the...
The Shame of Sexual Abuse
Unfortunately, shame and sexual abuse go together. Shame goes to the core and can result in feelings of being broken or less than. I rarely see a client who has been sexually abused or raped who doesn’t feel some sense of personal shame for what happened. Whether they...
Communication tools for couples
Are you a good listener? Do you think you communicate effectively? What would your partner say about your communication skills? How about when you are angry, sad, frustrated, or hurt?... Are you able to calm your emotions enough to LISTEN to the actual message and...
Igniting Your Sex Drive by Identifying Sexual Turn Ons
If I asked you what your turn ons were, would you know? If I asked your sexual partner what your turn ons were, would they know? Do you know what turns on YOUR sexual partner? How about previous sexual partners? How aware are you of what impacts your sex drive? And...
Our Biggest Sex Organ Is Between Our Ears
Yes, your biggest sex organ is your brain! Sex drive, sexual pleasure, and sexual satisfaction are more about what is between our ears than what is between our legs. However, our culture sees sex drive, sexual pleasure, and sexual dysfunction as being about our sexual...
Can’t Get in the Mood? Sexual Desire is Complicated.
Yes sexual desire is complicated. Are you saying to yourself, “I love my partner, I want to be sexual with my partner, I SHOULD be sexual with my partner but I just can't get in the mood”? Are you lacking the motivation or desire to make the effort to initiate sex,...
Are you running on emotional empty?
Are you running on emotional empty? While I don’t like to minimize the work I do, sometimes therapy or counseling is pretty basic. Sometimes basic questions like “What are you doing to take care of yourself?” or “What fills up your emotional tank?” are all that are...
Could porn cause erectile dysfunction or intimacy problems?
Could porn cause erectile dysfunction or intimacy problems? With all the media coverage of porn addiction, you may be saying, "porn, what’s the big deal?" but if you or your partner has erectile dysfunction (difficulty getting or maintaining erections) or delayed...
True Love or Co-dependency?
Is it true love or co-dependency? One of my many insightful clients brought up recently that the book “The Giving Tree” http://www.shelsilverstein.com/books/book-title-giving-tree/ seems more about a person’s co-dependency with a partner who takes, is selfish, and...